The Murray Family: I love long weekends!

I think I've already fulfilled my quota of complaining about working. It's hard though. Not only am I adjusting to a new job, I'm adjusting to being away from Madelyn. Neither are fun. It's hard for two main reasons: 1. I want to be home. 2. I'm anxious that I can't deliver all that I promised. My coworkers are forming their initial opinion of me. I sold them in the interview by explaining what a 'go getter' I am. I told them about the all of the programs and the 'above and beyond' I would bring the district as I did for MPS. Yet, I don't have the endless amount of time I did before Madelyn was born. I try to remind myself that I am just a part time employee. Yes, that is part of it, but the other part is that I don't want to work late. In fact, I met with a teacher after school and before I knew it, it was 5pm. I literally cried the whole way home because I knew I would hardly get to see my sweet baby. It's difficult. I've fought off tears multiple times.....obviously sometimes the tears win. I told Casey that I need this though. I feel overwhelmed. I feel sad. I feel pushed to my limits. Sometimes I need to cry. Yet, I do know it will get better. I'm working on a system. I remind myself that if I care about having a career once my children are schoolage and grown, I need to work now. I tell myself Madelyn will have a richer life by me working. And I know the weeks will fly by...however, unlike the past where I easily counted away the days, if I do that now, I'm counting away the days of Madelyn being my little baby. I don't want to rush time. I really do want to embrace each day. I do want to live in the now. I do want to find happiness in my work too. So I will try! I hope it will get easier and easier.

So I LOVE my long weekends more than I ever have before. I've turned into the crazy person who doesn't want to meet her friends until she's put her baby to bed. I don't care...that's me now I guess.

Casey hosted his brother's bachelor party Labor Day weekend in Tomahawk. Madelyn and I lived it up and were busy little ladies all weekend!

Saturday morning we hit up the Farmer's Market in Beloit. I haven't been to Beloit since high school and it's bad reputation was stuck in my head. From what I saw, the Downtown was bustling with great stores and the Farmer's Market was AWESOME. My thoughts on the city have completely changed! Madelyn hung out in her stroller while we had a great breakfast! I was thrilled to pick up great veggies as I just started making Madelyn's baby food. So far she has loved my sweet potatoes, carrots, and green beans. Oddly, she didn't like the pears I made her one bit! I wish the growing season were longer. I'm having a blast hitting up the Farmer's Markets and picking out food to make for her!

I've been trying to get Madelyn in her device whenever she will be sitting idle anyway. She is supposed to be sleeping in it and having her footsies free during the day. I don't think the doctors realize how sleep is already difficult for us. Trying to have her sleep in this is a nightmare. The first few nights she woke up every hour. I can't let her just cry back to sleep as she pulls her feet out of it then. So every time she wakes up, I have to put her back to sleep. We had one great night where she slept in it for 11 hours. I thought we were on to something....that was three nights ago!

I went to Brady and Megan's wedding at Rotary Gardens. It was so strange to be there 'single'. I didn't like it much! Megan (as you can tell) was a stunning bride and they had a beautiful day.